Rejected Jokes

Undercovers Premieres September 22 at 8pm on NBC!

Fri, 30 Jul 2010 16:00:00 -0700

Undercovers will air Wednesdays at 8PM on NBC starting on September 22nd! I could not be more excited. Can’t wait for everyone to see the show. Here’s a pic from today’s TCA panel. Thank you to all of the wonderful people who interviewed us throughout the day.

Peep World gets a Red Carpet Gala Premiere at the Toronto Film Festival

Tue, 27 Jul 2010 10:40:00 -0700

Last year, I acted in a film alongside Michael C. Hall, Sarah Silverman and Rainn Wilson entitled Peep World. Today, Variety announced that our movie was selected for one of the highly sought after Red Carpet Gala Premieres at the Toronto Film Festival.

I’m incredibly excited. The cast of this movie is fantastic. It includes the Meyerwitz family mentioned above (Michael, Sarah, Rainn and me) as well as Taraji P. Henson, Kate Mara, Ron Rifkin, Lesley Ann Warren, Judy Greer, Alicia Witt and Stephen Tobolowsky.

Here’s a quick description from the Toronto Film Festival website. I play the youngest sibling, Nathan.

Peep World
Barry Blaustein, USA
World Premiere
On the day of their father’s 70th birthday party, four siblings come to terms with the publication of a novel written by the youngest sibling that exposes the family’s most intimate secrets.

My interview with Jordan Farmar (World Champion Los Angeles Lakers)

Tue, 29 Jun 2010 09:44:00 -0700

In celebration of the Los Angeles Lakers winning the NBA championship, I’m reposting an interview I did for last year’s ESPY Awards with Los Angeles Lakers point guard Jordan Farmar. In the same video, I interview Los Angeles Dodgers’ Golden Glove winner Matt Kemp, so if you like LA sports, this video is kinda perfect for you. The short was one part of a series of interviews I did with pro athletes last year entitled- “ESPN’s Conversations with Ben Schwartz”.

CLICK HERE FOR MORE CONVERSATIONS WITH BEN SCHWARTZ

Variety: Universal Acquires Feature Pitch from Ben Schwartz

Fri, 18 Jun 2010 08:20:00 -0700

This morning, Variety made the announcement about the feature script I am writing for Universal Pictures titled “Would You Rather”. The movie is being produced by Imagine Entertainment and is based on an idea from the brilliant Brian Grazer. I’ve been writing on the project for a few months now and everyone has been amazing. A big thank you to Brian, Kim, Karen and Erin at Imagine as well as Peter and everyone else at Universal. Here is the article from Variety. Click on the picture below to see a larger readable version.

UNIVERSAL ACQUIRES FEATURE PITCH FROM BEN SCHWARTZ

Jake and Amir: Office Painter- The Complete Saga

Tue, 15 Jun 2010 11:36:00 -0700

Here’s my latest appearance on CollegeHumor’s wonderful Jake and Amir series. This time I play a painter. Enjoy!

JAKE AND AMIR: OFFICE PAINTER- PART 1

JAKE AND AMIR: OFFICE PAINTER- PART 2

OFFICE PAINTER- PART 2 OUTTAKES

ALL OF MY JAKE AND AMIR APPEARANCES

Chasing Laughter with Ben Schwartz: My Interview with the Huffington Post

Wed, 09 Jun 2010 07:27:00 -0700

A few days ago, Nick Kreiss interviewed me for the amazing Huffington Post. He wanted to do a piece on how I got to where I am and how the internet can aid in one’s career…but what he got…was so much more.*

*not really. He pretty much got what he wanted.

A big thank you to Nick for being wonderful and turning an hour of my rambling into an actual article. You can read the full interview here- CHASING LAUGHTER WITH BEN SCHWARTZ or by clicking the photo of the beginning of the article below.

Breaking Bad News with Baby Animals T-SHIRTS!

Mon, 31 May 2010 10:34:00 -0700

Amanda McCall and I wrote a book a few years back entitled Grandma’s Dead: Breaking Bad News with Baby Animals.

It was selling so well over at Urban Outfitters that they wanted to design T-shirts around a few of the postcards. Well the dream is alive and the first T-shirt just went on sale!

You don’t have to be nearly as depressed or frail as the woman in this picture to look great in this shirt. Buy it at any Urban Outfitters or online by clicking the link below.

Urban Outfitters: Dreams Don’t Come True Shirt

Official Trailer for Undercovers- soon to air on Wednesdays at 8pm on NBC!

Sun, 16 May 2010 22:45:00 -0700

NBC announced that Undercovers will air on Wednesdays at 8PM starting this Fall. I can’t wait! Until then, here is the official trailer and a teaser made for NBC’s Upfronts.

Full Length Trailer

Preview Clip

Click Here For More Videos of Undercovers

Jean Ralphio Goes Clubbing on Parks and Rec

Fri, 14 May 2010 09:38:00 -0700

Last night, Jean-Ralphio made his sleazy return to Pawnee in a hilarious episode of Parks and Recreation (which featured Rob Lowe and Adam Scott) titled “The Master Plan.” As always, everyone on set was amazing. It was so much fun coming back for a third time. Here are Jean-Ralphio’s scenes from last night.

That Guy is a Total Douche

Here are links to the rest of the scenes:

Jean-Ralphio Finds April (Extended Producer’s Cut)

Jean Ralphio Let’s Get Outta Here

Jean-Ralphio Dances

Jean-Ralphio Dances Again

Lastly, here is a GIF some fantastic Parks and Rec fan made before the show even aired on the west coast.

Assorted Jelly Beans- Freddy Krueger

Tue, 04 May 2010 10:55:00 -0700

Here is the sixth installment of Assorted Jelly Beans, the one panel comic written by myself and brilliantly illustrated by Steve Dressler. In this installment, we cover the quick fix to taking care of Freddy Krueger.

Previous Assorted Jelly Beans-

NBC picks up Undercovers!!!

Mon, 03 May 2010 12:22:00 -0700

NBC has picked up the JJ Abrams show Undercovers! I am so excited for everyone to see this show! I had so much fun filming it. Everyone involved has been amazing- JJ Abrams, co-creator Josh Reims (of gold), the cast, everyone at Bad Robot, Warner Bros. television and NBC. I am so honored to be a part of this series and can’t wait to act as Hoyt again!

Here’s the link to the Hollywood Reporter Article

The AWARD WINNING Breaking Bad News with Baby Animals Desk Calendar

Mon, 03 May 2010 11:02:00 -0700

Some of you may know about the book I co-wrote with my friend Amanda McCall entitled Grandma’s Dead: Breaking Bad News with Baby Animals.

Only a select few know that Breaking Bad News was turned into a hilarious Desk Calendar. A dozen people in that subset know there is something called the 2010 Calendar Marketing Association National and World Calendar Awards. Three of those human beings know that we were submitted for the coveted Desk Calendars: Retail Division: Most Humorous Award. Only our publisher knew that we won.

Here are links to buy all of our stuff- the books, the AWARD WINNING desk calendar and be on the look out for T-SHIRTS coming to Urban Outfitters in the upcoming month.

Grandma’s Dead: Breaking Bad News with Baby Animals

Why is Daddy in a Dress: Asking Awkward Questions with Baby Animals

Grandma’s Dead: Breaking Bad News with Baby Animals DESK CALENDAR

Grandma’s Dead: Breaking Bad News with Baby Animals UK Version (Hardcover)

Jake And Amir: Private Eye BLOOPERS

Fri, 30 Apr 2010 14:52:00 -0700

Here are some out-takes from the crazy/hilarious Jake and Amir: Private Eye.

RejectedJokes.com is Officially Tumbling!

Tue, 27 Apr 2010 10:01:00 -0700

After four years of hiding on blogger, I have officially moved my website Rejectedjokes.com to Tumblr! This move is equal parts exhilarating and terrifying.

I know I’m like half a decade late to the party but please Tumblr, don’t make me wait in the corner while you dance to cool 90s hip hop/R&B. I want to dance with you!

Jake and Amir: Private Eye

Mon, 26 Apr 2010 17:36:00 -0700

I play an insane private eye in “quite possibly the craziest Jake and Amir episodes you will ever see.” This is my third series with the intensely funny Jake and Amir. Check out the other series we’ve done together- Dating Coach and Couple’s Therapist.

LA Times: Comedy Talent Scouts

Mon, 22 Mar 2010 11:19:00 -0700

The iconic casting director Allison Jones was nice enough to give me a mention in the LA Times article about comedy talent scouts. The paragraph I’m mentioned in is below, the full article is linked underneath.

“Jones finds people through a network of talent managers and through her own diligent research. She’s often at the “Asssscat” show at the Upright Citizens Brigade in Hollywood and she visits the Second City Company in Chicago once a year. Though she calls herself “a hermit” who doesn’t do lunch or parties, she is a voracious moviegoer who reads every review in every publication and spends hours online watching comedy videos. Three years ago, for instance, she was introduced to comedian Ben Schwartz after she read a tiny mention of him in Time Out New York. Now he’s popping up on NBC’s “Parks and Recreation” and in a J.J. Abrams pilot.”

CLICK HERE TO READ FULL ARTICLE

The Return of Jean-Ralphio on Parks and Rec

Fri, 05 Mar 2010 11:21:00 -0800

Last night, Jean-Ralphio, the character I play on NBC’s Parks and Rec, made his triumphant return in an intensely funny episode entitled Woman of the Year. This show is so amazing, I’m beyond thrilled to be a part of it. Everyone over there has been so wonderful- writers, producers, actors, sound, hair, make-up, PAs, everyone. Thank you so much. Here are my scenes from yesterday’s episode.

*Unfortunately, Hulu took down the episode/Jean-Ralphio scenes.

Mayne Street: John Hancock

Tue, 02 Mar 2010 09:10:00 -0800

In this episode of Mayne Street, Kenny Mayne signs over Mike Greenberg’s name on a celebrity banner and my character, Evan Mintz, is sent in to put everyone in their place.

If the video doesn’t work you can watch it on ESPN here.

Mayne Street: Kidnapped

Tue, 23 Feb 2010 09:55:00 -0800

Here is a new episode of the ESPN web series Mayne Street. This episode features the hilarious Kenny Mayne getting kidnapped by Olympic Curlers. I make an appearance as the VP of ESPN, Evan Mintz, near the end of the short. As always the guys at ESPN were amazing to work with.

Me on the Sarah Silverman Program!!!

Wed, 17 Feb 2010 15:49:00 -0800

Thursday night at 10:30PM I have a small role on the Sarah Silverman Program on Comedy Central. Thank you to everyone who makes this show so amazing- the writers, actors, production hands, the insanely talented Rob Schrab and an enormous thank you to one of the funniest and warmest human beings on the planet, Big S. By sheer luck, the preview for tomorrow’s episode includes my entire scene, watch below!